Friendship may, and often does, grow into love, but love never subsides into friendship. Lord Byron.

14th March 2015.

Happy Mammys Day

I woke to an overflowing kitchen sink of washing up and an equally overflowing wash basket. So today was decided Id take a day off! No cleaning, cooking or anything, after all I live in a home with other adults!

I left to take my Mum`s card and presents, leaving my home still sleeping at midday, no card or present for me, this reinforced my day off decision!

My Mum was happy with her mother`s day, especially when we were joined by my Sister and her crew and our older Brother also rang her.

While I was at Mum`s my Son decided to clean the kitchen and do the washing up, which was lovely. I continued to take my day off and by the time I went to bed, Id done nothing! It was lovely!

16th March.

Unknown Generic Man With Blank Empty Anonymous Face

I have been trying to forget something I saw whilst looking for pictures for my previous blog on Google images. In among innocent pictures and quotes. As I scanned, to my horror I came across a photograph; in this picture was three heads. At a glance I thought it was from a horror film, and placed among the other pictures by mistake. On closer inspection I ran cold when I realised I was looking at real men, now dead  from beheading, and that in no order others followed, and a beheaded torso.  How can this be right that they are allowed to be so readily available, or even on the net at all? What if children came across them? Parents fear porn, violence and cyber bullying but not things like this; you can`t ban children from everything, particularly something that seems as innocent as Google images? I only hope that my little nephews never come across something so horrific because i`m having trouble forgetting them myself.



Beannachtaí na Féile Pádraig oraibh! 

Happy St Patricks Day

I didn`t make as much fuss of this St Paddy`s after last year, as my Lad was barely around. This year I made a big `traveller` stew and Colcannon, then sat down with a bottle of Baileys and the tele on my Jack Jones.

Though saying that I was over the moon to get a St Patricks card from Family, that stood on my side next to the Daffodils I bought myself for Mother`s day.

To me St Patrick`s day is a time I remember my Nanny in Ireland, now gone. She is the one that was my hands across the sea, she kept me a part of my Irish side and i still have the cards she`s send me on St Patrick’s day, together with birthday cards and letters. I loved her dearly and still miss her. She was the link to family I never saw, especially Cousins my age.

I never really felt accepted or part of my Mother`s Family, apart from an Aunt, Uncle and Cousins that lived nearby. I always felt distant, different and my English Nan made references that I was `like her father,` and my disability seemed an inconvenience to her or made her uncomfortable; she`d say things as though I couldn`t hear.

`Nanny in Ireland,` as I always called her, eventually got a telephone, I loved speaking to her for the first time, and eventually I spent some time at her home, and saw so much of myself in her, but my brothers eyes, apart from colour. She was chatty, full of tales and always had the hob on with pigs trotters stewing and loved my little dog at the time.

Like many things in my life, a man I was with at the time ruined things, unbeknown to me he stole from her home and it caused trouble, though nan never held me accountable thankfully, as I was never to see her again. To me St Patrick`s day is about remembering her.Irish families

  2oth March 2015.

I got new glasses today, after seeing the opticians a week or so go. These match my new hair colour and are cool to look at, but hurt my nose and head, i`m hoping over time we`ll blend more comfortably as they were £168!

Karen Millan


inner child 2 It`s been a time for little people birthdays, with a Nephew turning six and cake, candles and over excitement being the order of the day; my favourite kind of fun!


Inner child 3


Within my home I handed out my Easter eggs on the 21st, for Ostara, the spring Equinox, as this is my time for appreciating nature. Keep-Eostre-in-Easter

This marks the Spring Equinox. This is the Pagan “Easter” – or rather, this is the day that Christians borrowed to be their Easter. It is traditionally the day of equilibrium, neither harsh winter or the merciless summer, and is a time of childish wonder. Painted eggs, baskets of flowers and the like are generally used to decorate the house. It is common to use this time to free yourself from things which hinder progress. As a day of equilibrium, it is a good time to perform self banishings and also perform workings to gain things we have lost, or to gain qualities we wish to have.

The second of the 3 spring festivals, this Sabbat occurs in mid march when day and night are of equal length. This festival is also of fertility where seeds are blessed for planting soon after. Traditional colours for this holiday are light green, lemon yellow and pale pink. (

Bye March

March left in fierce winds and a day with my two young Nephews, which was loud, hectic, fun, messy, bickering, beeping, drawing, glueing, sticking and eating! Perfect! i-love-my-nephews

Hello April

Already Daffodils stand tall and bright. The cherry trees have buds, as the Bluebells carpet woods and the April showers swap with blue skies, a beautiful time of year.

Family branches

Already the warmer weather brings Family, and it`s so nice to re-connect and catch up on how we all are. Friends visit, they are `chosen` family that have been part of our lives so long that they feel like family apart from DNA, they too visit and fit in perfectly.

Mums house

Mums` is……….

Where paper`s rustle, pages turn,

biscuit tins, sit open on tabletops, 

favourites fill in flavours on thumbs.

Daughters congregate on seats,

comfortable silences or chatty.

Small dogs sit, or big`un bounce,

as crumbs fall to patient tongues. 

Grandsons visit, loud and young,

in the forever full fridge of favs.

Mum`s is where home still is,

comfortable; we are ourselves,

off days, happy days, ill days,

children again, relax days.

These are always Mum days,

only the brickwork changes.


The key.

Daily dedication,

  the key turns.

A silent sentiment,

  that normality waits. 

Sometimes I see situations,

    as age or disability escalates.

Memory staggers,

    health hazards.

 Goldfish bowl style,

  scanning the scenes.

Today was different,

  her dog cried constantly;

Hour or more he barked, 

  I waited, listened nearby.

The walls thin, unsure,

  dignity a priority.

  a million scenarios,

  flashed in my mind.

Dread started to fill,

  decision descending.

I turned her key,

  unsure, unknown.

Today was a good day,

  I had forgotten her plans.

She entered and laughed, 

 as I relayed my tale of fear.

Deep, deep dread in a pit, 

   doom, as I turn the key.




About Maith an cailin

Born in the 1960s, I`m a single Mum of a young adult. I am a full-time wheelchair user, who has been single since a marriage breakdown in 2008. I live in a UK remote village, not easy with a disability but this is a honest account of a ordinary Woman with a disability.
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